Episode Details
The American Psychological Association defines stress resilience as “the process of adapting well in the face of adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats, or significant sources of stress.” Stress and trauma are often part of life. How can we learn to be more resilient when facing stress and trauma? Can EMDR therapy help? Find out what Rachael Miller, LCPC, NCC, says about EMDR and stress resilience.
Episode Resources
- Focal Point Blog: Stress and Understanding Resilience Through EMDR
- Go With That MagazineTM: Understanding Resiliency Through EMDR Therapy(login req), Volume 26, Issue 1, Winter 2021
- “How EMDR Works,” English version, EMDR Netherlands, YouTube
- “How EMDR Works”, Dutch version, EMDR Netherlands, YouTube
- EMDRIA Client Brochures (member login req)
- EMDRIA Library
- EMDRIA Practice Resources
- EMDRIA’s Find an EMDR Therapist Directory lists more than 16,000 EMDR therapists.
- Follow @EMDRIA on Twitter. Connect with EMDRIA on Facebook or subscribe to our YouTube Channel.
- EMDRIA Online Membership Communities for EMDR Therapists
- Musical soundtrack, Acoustic Motivation 11290, supplied royalty-free by Pixabay.
Episode Transcript
Kim Howard 00:04
Welcome to the Let’s Talk EMDR podcast brought to you by the EMDR International Association or EMDRIA. I’m your host, Kim Howard. In this episode, we are talking with EMDR certified therapists and consultant Rachel Miller, about EMDR therapy and stress resilience. Let’s get started. Today we are speaking with EMDR certified therapist and consultant Rachel Miller to discuss EMDR therapy and stress resilience. Thank you, Rachel, for being here today. We are so happy that you said yes.
Rachael Miller 00:33
Yeah, thank you. I love doing this kind of thing.
Kim Howard 00:36
So Rachel, can you tell us a little bit about your path to becoming an EMDR therapist?
Rachael Miller 00:41
Yeah, so I was burned out in the field and looking for a new direction by shifted to university teaching and had considered leaving for full time academics. But training and EMDR and intervention that I used to giggle about due to its super fans, it recharged my love for direct service. And so it’s remained a consuming part of my clinical work ever since.
Kim Howard 01:02
That’s a good story. And you’re not the first person on the podcast to talk about sounded a little out there. I’m not really sure I want to do this. And then you get into the training and you’re like, Oh, this is like, legit, this really works. So.
Rachael Miller 01:16
There was a lot of my mentors going all through my internship, when I first started were really big into EMDR. They’d always talk about it, they’d share examples at staff meetings, in a case reviews. And it always sounded incredibly intriguing to me, but because I had other areas of focus, so like I’m trying to PCIT and a couple of other areas, it was not something that necessarily hit my radar, except when I was about to leave direct service was a bit kind of over it. And when you didn’t want I always want to do is always want to train in this. I’ve never tried it. Let’s go for it. And then yeah, it’s it’s become, like I said, kind of the all consuming piece of my practice now.
Kim Howard 01:56
What’s your favorite part of working with EMDR therapy?
Rachael Miller 01:59
I have two favorite parts. It tend to be results oriented person who gravitates towards interventions that bring demonstrable change. I’m sure many of us share that commonality that the joy of witnessing just lasting growth and healing for our clients. I also think it draws a certain style of therapist where I feel more at home with my peers and the way we approach problems.
Kim Howard 02:20
Rachel, can you please define stress, resilience?
Rachael Miller 02:24
Stress resilience is all about our ability to respond and adapt to difficult distressing or painful situations. Many conversations about stress, resilience, also focus on being able to grow and gain new skills from having those experiences. So I’m okay if those around me are not okay, or not responding the way I had hoped, like meeting my needs in the moment, or I’m not okay now, but can be okay, when utilizing both internally focused skills like adaptability, self soothing and coping, and outwardly focused skills like certain actions so self assertiveness, communication, utilizing social supports.
Kim Howard 03:08
Thank you. What are the specific complexities or challenges with EMDR therapy for stress resilience?
Rachael Miller 03:15
Sometimes, the irony is that amazing mechanisms our nervous systems have to survive and thrive during unbelievable life tragedies, or even when managing everyday high stress situations, by the very mechanisms that can get in the way of post growth and stress resilience. I’m speaking to our two major emergency responses upregulation and downregulation. These are both things that help us survive in the moment. They get us through the hardest parts by helping us disconnect through downregulation when we’re unable to escape a situation or run away when there’s an imminent danger through pop regulation. However, once these moments are over, or are not currently present, the body can stay in overdrive and struggle to reset, which then brings on gnarly, ongoing symptoms, making stress resilience difficult. So upregulation can mean anything from hyper vigilance, anxiety, increased sensory sensitivities, startling easily stomach and digestive issues, or even interpreting others neutral faces as angry mean or upset with us when they’re not. downregulation includes dissociation, disconnection, not feeling present in our bodies, lacking motivation, depression, difficulty focusing, feeling hopeless and trapped, or even just having a general negative outlook. These symptoms are an indicator that our nervous system is stuck in a cycle of fight flight freeze or fawn. And the way we promote stress resilience is by supporting the nervous system and getting back to what we call rest and digest. Or practically speaking, not seeing threats everywhere, when the threats actually over, are not currently in the room with us at all times. Even what we call the standard protocol for EMDR can address a lot of these issues by helping clients process the core events or memories behind them, or assessing where they started. Many times during even my own EMDR work, I have been completely surprised by what events or memories have were actually behind some of my current symptoms, processing those negative life events and memories through EMDR helps the nervous system rewire, and reduces triggers, or even neutral life things as simple as smells, images, or sounds, so that our bodies are not living as if the emergency is omnipresent, and can experience neutrality, or even safety, love and support by a chosen and trusted community. Additionally, EMDR also has what’s called phase two, which focuses on resourcing or what we could describe as building coping tools and skills that also supports neutrality of the nervous system. So these skills and tools help with regulation while you’re going through the process of EMDR, and receiving the treatment. And it also then becomes easier to implement those tools and skills in everyday life, once the trauma load has been reduced, and some of those source materials taken care of. So in other words, it’s a lot easier to implement those internal and external, healthy and adaptive responses that I mentioned earlier, once that source material has been neutralized.
Kim Howard 06:25
That’s a great explanation. Thank you. And I feel like most of us learn how to handle things or self soothe; most of us learn that in a family environment, right? Somebody’s teaching us grandparents, caregiver, parents are teaching us how to deal with things that stressed us out or things that disappointed us or things that make us angry or upset or hurt us. I think some people out there don’t have that in their initial family relationship. And when they encounter things that stress them out. They don’t know how to be resilient, because they haven’t been taught some basic skills about how to how to deal with that, you know, so I’m glad that we’re talking about this, because I think that people need to know that EMDR therapy is a resource for them and can help them deal with not just stress resilience, but any other thing that that might come their way. But I’m glad that you explain that in detail. Thank you.
Rachael Miller 07:23
Yeah, I think it’s a it’s a bit of both, you know, it’s about what sort of models we have growing up what we witness, you know? When I really specialized in child development back in the day, you know, we would talk about, you know, couples would kind of say, Oh, I don’t want to argue in front of the kids, I don’t want them to see the argument, we say no, let them see the argument. Also let them see the resolve. Because witnessing that is how you deal with conflict, how you deal with even if I misbehave and make a mistake or do something wrong, there is still safety and security in our relationships that can be trusting and kind of move past that. And often we lack some of those models. Same thing when we’re talking about child development isn’t really one of the easiest ways to illustrate it. We’re talking about let’s say body image issues. Often you’ll have a parent say I never sent directly to my child or your body is ugly, or you’re you’re overweight, or you’re too skinny, or whatever comments on the way they look nothing but praises telling them the beautiful telling they’re accepting the way they are. One of the things we point to is okay, but how do you then speak about your own body? And how do you speak about other people’s bodies? How do you speak about movie stars bodies? People walking down the red carpet? What comments are you making? Because it’s about observational models? So that’s one piece is do we have good models or not? Then the other side of is what are then those life experiences. We have that supercharged the nervous system into getting into that locked position, because we all have kind of these universal traits to our nervous system. That’s that fight, flight, freeze that we even see in the animal kingdom, you know, and that’s not without reason, you know, okay, there’s a lion staring at me, I always joke, there’s a line staring at me, I don’t have time to go well, I wonder what kind of mood he’s in. And maybe we can have that, you know, the the gazelle next door is tastier than I am. And no, because he’s been eating a different kind of grass and me lately, it’s, you know, so there’s a reason why we jumped to his automatic states for safety. Problem is, is that then, if we don’t have adaptive responses that follow that and we get stuck in that state, stress resilience is really hard to do. So if you’re lacking models, and the nervous system is stuck in that state of up regulation or down regulation, then it’s really hard to move forward and very simple, easy, everyday things, or even mild to moderate daily stressors are then things that we have really strong intense responses to, or reactions to, because we didn’t start out at a neutral baseline space.
Kim Howard 09:45
That’s good explanation. Thank you. Rachel, what successes have you seen using EMDR therapy for this approach?
Rachael Miller 09:53
Yes, one of the reasons I love being an EMDR therapist and have also become a superfan, like my previous mentor, is because I’ve seen so much success in this area. When we talk about stress resilience, we’re getting to the very core of trauma recovery, and what we call post traumatic growth. So just some very easy, simple recent examples, a client told me they were both surprised and proud of themselves when a family member told them that they were unable to attend, attend a holiday barbecue the client so that historically, it would have triggered downregulation response they would have immediately felt personally rejected, experienced depression, believing that this was a direct, slight, and an illustration of that family members love and commitment to them personally, the client said that instead, because of the work that they had done in the EMDR reprocessing, they were able to de personalize it and understand the context that the family member needed to focus on a parenting issue that unexpectedly came up. In another example, a client said that they had received a negative comment from a colleague on a Google doc in front of other colleagues, which typically would have triggered an upregulation response, a significant anxiety, perfectionism, sleeplessness, restlessness, and lots of intrusive thoughts about even their ability to do the job, and how they appeared to others. But reported instead, because of the work they had done, they were able to take the feedback as neutral and even in a positive way, gain skills by learning from that feedback.
Kim Howard 11:25
That’s a great example. And I think they’re good reminders for all of us that not everything’s about us. I mean, we think it’s about us, right? You know, oh, they didn’t come to my party. It’s something to do with me. Well, it really in reality, it’s really not about you. It’s about their family situation. And they made a comment in front of my colleagues, and they embarrassed me. Well, you know, that was not their intent. And I think that when you’re in those kinds of situations, you kind of have to step back a little bit and just think about, was this really their intent? No, probably not. It’s the rational part of you has to come into play somewhere and remind you that that’s not necessarily the case. So I’m glad you mentioned that. Thank you. That’s a great example.
Rachael Miller 12:07
Yeah, I always say that trauma recovery is about empowerment through choice. And if we are automatically responding without a sense of resiliency, we don’t have a choice, we’re automatically reacting. So empowerment through choice often then means depersonalization. And adding context, which is something in modern society, we have found to be really difficult and has been highlighted in a lot of arenas that are just as you said, a part of our kind of humaneness condition. That ego center kind of takes over.
Kim Howard 12:40
My children or adult children, but I’ve talked to them about this, as well as that, because everything is almost everything now is text messaging, right, and you don’t have context, when you text message people, you don’t have facial expressions, you have no tone of voice, you don’t have eye contact, you’re just getting words in a screen, and they can sometimes be misinterpreted. You know, and so sometimes it’s better just to have a quick five minute conversation, even if it’s just a phone call, and you can’t do a zoom call, or you can’t do a FaceTime just to, you know, work out whatever the issue might be, so you can understand going forward and not only rely on that text message, thank you for that reminder, Rachel. Are there any mess that you would like to bust about stress resilience?
Rachael Miller 13:24
Yeah, in thinking about this, I came up with three. One is that stress resilience does not mean that you’re not impacted, or should somehow shut down negative emotions and never experienced them. It’s about actually the opposite about embracing those negative emotions and sensations, befriending them knowing that they’re there to protect you in the moment, so that you can then bring yourself back to a sense of safety internally. Secondly, supporting the nervous system in gaining resilience is more protective than holding on to the negative events or interactions themselves. So it’s an often understandable belief that we need to remember these events, we need to hold on to these interactions we’ve had with others, in order to keep ourselves safe, which then can lead us unfortunately, into that holding pattern in our nervous system keeps us in that threat, response and vigilance of looking out for it. Adapting and healing from those events or interactions, allowing the nervous system to feel at ease means the body’s actually better resourced, and better prepared and in a better position to then respond to any additional life events or stressors. So taking care of those things and healing from those things, actually empowers you and protects you further versus leaving you at risk and more vulnerable. Thirdly, stress resilience is easier to achieve after life experiences have ended. So if we’ve had experiences that have happened, and then they had an end, it’s a lot easier to recover from that it’s a lot easier to get back to that neutrality, and it’s a lot easier to kind of invite that resiliency that at that patient and that growth, then when we’re talking about life experience that are more chronic and ongoing. But it’s also good to know that that doesn’t mean it’s impossible to achieve. And it doesn’t mean that you can’t have those moments or have that growth. If your stressors or your events or traumas, whatever it is. Negative life experiences are ongoing. It doesn’t mean you still can’t gain resiliency within that it does mean that you know, it’s understandably a little bit tougher.
Kim Howard 15:27
Yeah, that’s good. Thank you, Rachel. What would you like people outside of the EMDR community to know about EMDR therapy and stress resilience?
Rachael Miller 15:35
The nervous system is adaptable and can be influenced. If you currently struggle with stress, resilience, there’s many things you can do to support yourself in building that resilience. One of those things is finding an EMDR therapist or other intervention that helps you reset your nervous system. The goal is to use our negative or traumatizing experiences to grow, adapt and move beyond so that it does not have to become a permanent narrative about ourselves or to continue to intrude on our everyday functioning.
Kim Howard 16:09
Good answer. Thank you. Rachel, how do you practice cultural humility as an EMDR therapist?
Rachael Miller 16:17
Cultural humility is a simple concept with many applications. One of the practical ways I attempt to practice cultural humility in my clinical practice is during the information gathering stage, there are two specific questions on our intake forms that come after discussing the reason for seeking services, current symptoms, family history, treat treatment goals, etc. And they are does the client have any religious or spiritual orientations to consider during treatment? Does the client have any cultural or ethnic influences to consider during treatment? And those are asked directly to the client. I’ve learned to never assume anything about a client’s potential answers to those questions, but to listen to understand each client’s unique perspectives, these two questions can become the catalyst for great therapeutic work, because it invites the client to freely include these topics as a part of the work in discussion, they promote safety in the therapeutic space around these conversations. And it provides some of the most valuable information for case conceptualization, and helps me with navigating any of my own kind of biases or anything that could get in the way very client centric.
Kim Howard 17:22
Yeah, that’s good. And I presume that clients will fill that out well in advance before their first session so that you can, they don’t like they don’t hand it to you the day they come in. Right? They hand it to you earlier than you can look at it before your session. Is that how that normally works? Or is it like, Hey, here’s my paperwork, and nice to meet you.
Rachael Miller 17:40
It’s actually during our live session. So when we’re sitting with a client, asking those questions, and the number of kind of surprises I’ve received from clients over the years, you know, some some who said, Oh, wow, I didn’t know I was, quote, allowed to include that in therapy work, especially those who are newer to it. Others who are like, Oh, am I allowed to bring up religion and spirituality, whether that is related to, you know, religious trauma, or even something that uses a tremendous resource. Same thing for kind of cultural or ethnic influences how important those are to each individual client, whether that’s what they’ve experienced the repression, or even things like enriching traditions.
Kim Howard 18:18
It’s two questions. It’s not a lot. It’s not like you’re asking 20 questions you’re asking to fill out, and they’re pretty simple. And so that’s a great way to be open to getting that information so that you, you both can be together on the same page, I guess, as you’re pressing forward with the therapy relationship. So that’s great. Rachel, do you have a favorite free and do related resource that you would suggest either for the public or other EMDR therapists?
Rachael Miller 18:46
Yeah, I’d say for those that are providers, you remember access to the EMDRIA Library has an endless amount of resources, that’s a newer thing we have on offer, if you’re not a member, become one. So that you can gain access to that material, and loads of other resources even even just in connecting with fellow therapists. For those that are kind of general consumers have done it, if you’re interested in it. The emdria.org website has just a lot of stuff. If you do some looking around there, as well as our colleagues in the Netherlands have made really good animated video, just free on YouTube. But if you just google how EMDR works video in English, that is also a nice one to kind of orientate you into the basics of how EMDR works.
Kim Howard 19:32
That’s great. Thank you. And I will put a link in the episode description so people can go to that. So thank you, Rachel, if you weren’t an EMDR therapist, what would you be?
Rachael Miller 19:43
Considering that I almost left direct service for full time academics, I’d probably be a professor or maybe still be a professor. I was a professor. I love writing and designing curriculum. So I’d also be more focused in those areas and allocate more time to that.
Kim Howard 19:58
Okay, That’s good. Thank you. Is there anything else you’d like to add?
Rachael Miller 20:02
Yes, building stress resilience is not easy, but worthwhile. EMDR isn’t an investment including the advert time and finances and can seem impossible to take on while in the midst of managing everyday stresses. However, getting that support from someone like a skilled therapist that you connect well with means you have the opportunity to regularly dedicate an hour to focus on yourself a space of trust and security and renewed energy to heal, which all contributes to stress resilience.
Kim Howard 20:32
That’s a good way to end the podcast. Thank you, Rachel.
Rachael Miller 20:34
Of course. Thank you.
Kim Howard 20:36
This has been the Let’s Talk EMDR podcast with our guest Rachel Miller. Visit www.emdria.org. For more information about EMDR therapy, or to use our Find an EMDR Therapist Directory with more than 16,000 therapists available. Like what you hea? Make sure you subscribe to this free podcast wherever you listen. Thanks for being here today.
Date
July 1, 2024
Guest(s)
Rachael Miller
Producer/Host
Kim Howard
Series
3
Episode
13
Practice & Methods
Resilience, Your EMDR Practice
Extent
21 minutes
Publisher
EMDR International Association
Rights
© 2024 EMDR International Association
APA Citation
Howard, K. (Host). (2024, July 1). EMDR Therapy and Stress Resilience with Rachael Miller, LCPC, NCC (Season 3, No. 13) [Audio podcast episode]. In Let’s Talk EMDR podcast. EMDR International Association. https://www.emdria.org/letstalkemdrpodcast/
Audience
EMDR Therapists, General/Public, Other Mental Health Professionals
Language
English
Content Type
Podcast
Original Source
Let's Talk EMDR podcast
Access Type
Open Access